I stumbled across this blog post on Think Simple Now and it was one of those “just what I needed to hear” messages for me. While you may recognize some of it as Eckard Tolle-esque “Be Here Now”/”become a silent observer of the inner voice, which the ego won’t let you kill” psychobabble, there are a few things that I found of value.

First, a reminder of the fact that we really do “create our own reality,” not because we (necessarily) make magical shit happen with our minds, but because perception is everything.

Example of this in action- I am really struggling right now with our living situation. My mental dialogue is along the lines of, “This place is too small, there is nothing of mine here, we’re going to be stuck here forever, This isn’t my home, this place is too cluttered” and then I go down a very predictable but circular thought pattern. Without packing a single box, though, I can completely change the reality of my living situation if I put some effort into scripting my mental dialogue, “I am working towards a better future, Small sacrifices now mean greater gains later.” Or even, “ I am grateful to have someone to share my life with, and would gladly live with him in a cardboard box if I had to- this isn’t too bad.” I am working on the exact scripting, I want to keep the phrasing “sacrifices” out of the script, though, as that tends to send me down the “bad path.”

Think of your mental loops- they can relate to anything. What can you do to change them? Another one of my favorites involves words and phrases like “fat fuck” and “blubber.” How is that helping me towards my goals? Those loops can spiral out of control before you know it. Better to be prepared with a new script for when you catch yourself going down that path.

An exercise from Think Simple Now:

Try this simple yet powerful exercise. You can do this in a group of 2 or 3, or you can do it on your own.

1. Articulate a reality – In your life, you have something of concern to you, right now. Around this concern, you have crafted a reality. You say, this is what it is. Now, articulate this reality. Write it down if you are working on your own. Every detail and every assumption.
2. Craft an alternative reality – Come up with a possible alternative reality. This alternative reality must meet two criteria:
   1. It has to be better than the one you were describing, the one you are presently using.
   2. It has to be a reality that you can plausibly believe, on some level.
3. Start living as if your alternative reality were THE reality – when you start to do this, you will find two things happening:

1. 1. You will get lots of evidence saying: it’s not working. It’s not working. I guarantee you will. Just ignore that. Remember? Your mind is not you.
   2. You will get lots of evidence saying: It’s working! It’s working! – Recognize and celebrate it.

Second, these simple tips for making changes stick are spot-on, especially for people whose changes involve physical action:

In addition to the building blocks and alternative reality exercise above, here are some tips for making habitual changes in your life.

• Focus on just one – It’s challenging enough to make one habitual change, it’s even tougher if you try to divide your attention to make multiple drastic changes at the same time. I’ve successfully tried and failed at this. Give yourself at least 3 weeks of total concentration to change one reality before moving on to the next area of your life. Give yourself more time if you need. Some deep rooted realities can take months to undo.
• Mutual Support – Be around positive, uplifting and supportive people. Share with them your wins, joys and celebrations. It’s a great idea to form empowerment groups around you to discuss issues like this and to support each other in your personal growth. If you have a spouse, team up with them and make this a fun time to connect with one other.
• Understand Why – Be clear and specific on the why you want change. Motivation is the intrinsic drive which moves us into action and to ultimately change for the better. Motivation is created when our motives are clear. Fully understand the results of such change and results of no change. Write them down.
• Be Inspired – Spent at least 10 minutes every day reading or listening to something positive and empowering that inspires you. There is so much junk out there in our media heavy society, that if we don’t take the steps to surround ourselves with positive messages of hope, it’s easy to get sucked in to what we’re being exposed to. I’ve found this little video to be an uplifting thing to watch in the morning.

Reward & Celebration - I can’t stress this point enough, as I am guilty of not rewarding myself for Wins (because I’m too busy beating myself up over what I haven’t done yet). I recommend physical celebrations, because those tend to leave lasting marks on our unconscious mind. Give a high-five! Jump up and down! Do a happy dance! Reward yourself and treat yourself to something nice, like ice-cream or a movie.

Write it down – When you get evidence that it is working, do more than celebrating it. Make sure you record it down. Write it down. This is a very important step. There will be a natural laziness that comes into play whispering in your ears that you will remember it. But you won’t remember. Make sure to carry a note book or notepad with you at all times.

I hope you’ll turn to this community- especially for the “Mutual Support” and “Celebrate your Victories” (and even, yes, “Write it Down”) advice above!